The boy picks up a stick and draws out the play.  “Here’s the line of scrimmage.  Johnny, you go deep down the sideline.  Jimmy, you go out and across.   Tim, you block and then go short.” instructs the quarterback.  They break their huddle after taking a swift hand over the dirt to erase their precious plans.  The ball is snapped, the boy drops back to pass.  No one is open, but he realizes Jimmy is now going deep.  He throws the ball as far as he can.  Jimmy catches it and crosses the imaginary goal line. “Touchdown,” they yell, as all of the boys jump in celebration.

Later in life, the boys tried their hand in “organized” sports.  Some of them liked it while a few of them preferred not to continue in the sports world.  Similarly, many other children grew up acting like pirates in their self-made tree house which served as their imaginary ship.  Others, liked to pretend they were great models while fixing the hair on their dolls.  Some children liked to read and enter the imaginary world created by the author.

As the children grow into teenagers and adults, some of those imaginary worlds disappear.   Some of the joy in game playing is replaced with referees, coaches, and stringent rules.  The game is transformed from a Saturday afternoon in the park, to nearly twelve months of the year.  The game is transformed into practice, work outs, and hard work.

The girl who played the piano because she enjoyed the music and the challenge, is now forced to practice every day for an hour.  The teacher makes her learn the scales that will be good for her should she decide to enter a “musical career.”  Life changes.

Life changes in many different ways, but the days of ad-hoc football games in the park and fun in the tree house sometimes gets lost.  Even when the children become adults and play in “pick-up” games the competitiveness of the players can make it less enjoyable.

What is it about the need to win?  What is it about the need to be the best?  Why can we not just enjoy the sport without keeping score?  Why can we not just enjoy the sport without the need to win?  Even in the leagues that do not keep score, the children all  keep track.  Usually, the coach keeps a “win-loss” record at least in his mind.

It is human nature to measure yourself against others.   The problem is, it is the ego that provides that need.  That need for winning.  That need for being the best.

Mind you, there is nothing wrong with being the best, so long as you are okay with “not” being the best.  So long as you are perfectly fine stepping off of the court, or the field, with either a win or a loss.  Competition is fine so long as it does not consume your life.

When you look at your performance, it is best if you can compare it to other performances by yourself – rather than the performance of another.  It is best if you can look inside for the reasons you are doing whatever it is you are doing, and understand that there is no need to keep score, or a “win-loss” record.

Life is not about winning or losing.  Life is about playing the “game.”  When you “play” in life, you generally are happy.  The outcome of that play has little to do with it.

Think of what makes you laugh.  When you are laughing, you are expressing happiness and joy.  When you are done laughing, that happiness and joy may have diminished a bit.  However, while you are laughing, it is at its peak.  The same is true of “game playing.”  While you are playing the game, you can be at the maximum level of happiness and joy – especially, if you ignore the score.

Think about it this way.  What does it matter if you win the neighborhood league?  What does it matter if you lose the pick-up game?  Nothing.  Absolutely nothing.  Now, we understand that there are professional athletes for which their job is dependent on the outcome of their play.  That is a different situation.

What we are talking about here is the recreational play of nearly every child in a sport.  Nearly all of them may not play that sport after graduation from high school.  Many of them could play the sport afterwards, but are “burned out” and tired of it. What have we done to take something that so many have loved, added rules, coaches, and referees to make it something the children now hate?

What else are we doing this with?  Are we supporting our children in school to find subjects for which they are interested in expanding their knowledge?  Do we take away the love for learning similar to how the organization of sports may have pushed them away?

We are not trying to be negative in this message, but are trying to demonstrate how things can quickly change from being “fun” to being “work.”  Life is about fun, and work can be fun.  The challenge is figuring out how to make your work fun.

InspiraCard

Bring back those “imaginary worlds” you created in your youth.  You can pretend that your life is perfect, that you love your mate and your friends, and that your job is your dream job.  Maybe after awhile of “pretending” you will realize that you are not pretending at all.  After all, you can create anything that you can imagine.  Imagine the “perfect” world for yourself.

Written Tue, Feb 18, 2014, 7:38 – 7:59 AM